Lowercase "i" because I'm youthful and edgy.

FUCK YOU

oh shit

I think I'm part dead.

Did I really lose a friend?

At first, I really believed so. I really believed that yes, this person was my best friend, the one that I want to share everything with, the one I enjoy being around, and just an all-around good person. And I've lost a friend... A true friend.

But wait... What was that you said to me?

The only reason you are still my friend is... What?

It's because you thought you could convert me?

...

See, at first I didn't realize how much this statement meant.

I am... no, scratch that, was your friend because I thought you were a nice, cool, interesting person. You are fun to be around. We like the same sorts of things! That is why I was your friend!

I was not your friend because I wanted to add another name to my list of "People I Converted to Atheism." Do you know why?

Because I have the good goddamn sense to not shove my beliefs down unwilling throats.

I don't understand this at all...

How can you be friends with someone based solely on the fact that you want to convert them? Do you see me as a person, or a challenge? Do you even like me as a person? Do you even care?

After hearing you say that you are only still my friend because you want me to be a Christian, something terrible happened: I saw the future.

I saw you failing to "convert" me. I saw you realizing that I AM UNSHAKABLE. That I am STRONG and SMART. And after you realized this, you saw that your quest was over. You could not convert me. And then what happened?

You no longer saw any reason to be my friend.

That's sick. Just sick.

To destroy a friendship because I will never think like you! You are sad. Wake up. WAKE UP!

I want to scream it in your face! I have tried being civil. I have tried explaining to you how closed-minded you are being, but it does not work. So what else can I do?

I know exactly what I can do...

I can let go.

After seeing your true colors, I don't see any reason to hold on anymore. Is it strange that I'm not sad? Is it unnatural for me to not be hurt? Maybe it is.

But if you can justify being as closed minded as you are, if you can sleep at night, if you can convince yourself that you are right and you have no reason to doubt yourself... Then I see no reason to be upset.

I see no reason to care about losing someone who never cared for me in the first place.

Goodbye.

i have to ask myself...

Am I prepared to lose everything? I mean, EVERYTHING?

Am I afraid of losing everything?

What would I lose, anyway?

I could lose friends... Maybe some family members, too. I won't lose my home... No, my mom provides my home. Come to think of it, I don't really have much to lose.

Nothing left to lose, and everything to gain. The more I think about it, the more it seems like the perfect choice for me.

This could be it. This could really be it! I might be ready.

I may be ready...

Am I ready?

I think I'm ready.

I'd like to tell the world.

I'm ready.

what am I?

I'm stuck. :(

Will someone please help me out?

i'm not going to move my hand.

It was here first, and I like it where it is.

Next to yours... Fingers barely touching.

I'm not going to move my hand.

You can move yours if you'd like.

...Please don't.

omgomgomgomg

Stop saying embarassing things! You look really dumb right now.

This is important.

I need paper and pen, but I need it to be safe. A diary with a lock is hard to find, but without it what am I supposed to do? I can feel my creative spirit slowly dying. I need to touch paper, and use real ink for once. I need it to be real. I need to be able to say the things that I want everyone to know, just in case I die someday and I don't get the chance to tell them.

i honestly didn't think

that I would feel this bad.

I know he didn't mean to hurt me, but I feel so played. I feel like I should tell him.

I miss him. He was never mine, but I want him back.

cheating at Half-Life 2

Is fun; especially when you're lonely and you want to kill yourself.

give weapon_smg1

:P

i suppose

I'll feel real good about myself, when I look back on this in a couple of years.

i sometimes enjoy doing stupid things.

Especially when it involves a boy I have no chance with. But for a different reason this time.

He's not drop-dead gorgeous. He isn't six feet tall, nor does he have amazing abs. He isn't in a totally different social circle. He's not too many years older than me.

No, he is a good person, and a nice, friendly guy. I really like him... I really, really care about him. As lame as it seems, he is considering me as a potential romantic interest.

But here's why I have (almost) no chance.

He is a Christian. He loves god more than anything. He is pretty conservative.

I am "atheist." I will never believe in a god. I am pretty liberal.

It's a difficult place to be for him, he claims. Maybe he really does like me? Religion always gets in the way. I guess I won't know for a while. Or maybe I'll never know.

It's strange, but I like it.

Don't be scared...

i won't put up with it.

By this instance, I don't need to.